Before I start writing about our carriage driving experiences, I would like to introduce…Mother aka “glutton for punishment”.  She attacks every carriage drive with military force; she is like the Duracell battery who puts everyone else younger than her to shame. At the end of the day, when you are shattered and literally on your knees (probably due to having dislocated your knee cap for the 2973 time on the carriage wheel hub) she is there packing everything up with ferocity.  So a big hats off to mother for what she does.

Our first wedding entry is about a wedding in Worthing. The boys were ready and looking simply marvellous.  We set off to pick up our Bride and just as we were leaving I quickly instructed Mother (who had never driven our 7.5 tonne lorry before) that she had to move the lorry to a lay-by somewhere outside of Worthing to pick us up after the reception. A look of panic flooded her face as she was given this information but with no time to protest we were off at a trot to pick up our bride.

After dropping the bride off, we waited outside the church and soon after there emerged a group of late guests running franticly to get to the church before the bride could get inside.  It was one of those moments where you see the situation unfold before it happens. One of the guests attempting the sprint was a lady in astoundingly high, sky scraper heels. The combination of the heels, grass and fast movement meant she couldn’t quite maintain her balance and fell over, face planting herself at Charlie’s feet.  For a split second, everyone paused, a curious Charlie looked on and we tried hard to suppress an overwhelming desire to laugh.  Thankfully it was all taken in great jest, the lady was fine and after setting her back on her feet they continued to clatter inside.

Meanwhile, travelling in the lorry at an eye watering speed of 4 mph, Mother was edging her way to “a lay-by somewhere outside of Worthing”. Despite the hopelessly inept directions she did indeed make it and instructed us in a text message that part of the road en route to the lay-by was rather steep, “probably about a 10% gradient” she typed trying to be helpful. Not knowing what a 10% gradient might look like, we approached this hill with some trepidation.  As we got nearer we looked at each other with great cause for concern as it looked to be a sheer drop into an abyss.  Gradually as this abyss edged closer we established that the road did indeed continue and we proceeded to inch our way down in the carriage and both breathed a huge sigh of relief when we had reached the bottom.  There Mother was waiting, lorry in situ and with a picnic lunch unpacked on the ramp, a lovely sight!